Day 9- Never Forget

I took a glance out my window this morning only to find a fresh new layer of snow. It's a harsh reminder that Nature's got other plans than to let the sun shine forever. I normally love the snow, but this late in the year is just riduculous. It's unfortunate that you can't wish away the snow with willpower. If we could, I would've cleared the snow hours ago.

It reminds me of the dreams I had last night. It's been a long time since I've had such vivid dreams. I used to have them all the time. I guess I stopped having them after I became obsessed with Jay. When everyday life is like a dream, your mind thinks you don't need any at night. Now that the daydreams are gone, the night ones can come back. I can't say I'm terribly thrilled to be rid of my daydreams, but I'm still quite eager for the night dreams because they allow me to escape the dreariness and monotony of the real world. It's a wonderful experience to exist in a completely different world in which you are the master. I like the feel of the power since life in the day is out of control.

I've got work piling on. Not just physically, but the mental stress is also piling up. I'm going to spend the next few days squeezing in as much time to work as possible. It's really too bad I don't have many more distractions left. That just leaves me with one option: do my work. It's an option I've been jumping through hoops to avoid. Now that it's staring me right in the face, all I can do is sigh and get to work.

Maybe as a result of seeing the snow, I've been experiencing some flashbacks. Stuff that I thought was long forgotten is now flashing back, more bittersweet and permanent than before. Though it hurts to remind myself of the mistakes I've made, I have a feeling these flashbacks will be very beneficial in the next few days. Perhaps they'll keep me from making any more mind boggling mess-ups.

Among those memories stands a very clear and sharp reminder, the recent passing of a dearly loved family member. I feel sad, but I also remember all the happiness we had together. I stand a living witness of how fragile life is. We must live each day to it's full potential and squeeze out each special moment so that when we pass on, we have no regrets, only peace. Never forget how special each moment is and cherish it close to your heart.